How You Can Overcome Loneliness

Contemporary Americans are, overall, a pretty lonesome, friendless, bunch.


Our faith can help overcome this cloud of loneliness that so many feel.


You don’t have to look around very long to find lonely people.
A haunting song you still hear is “Eleanor Rigby.” “Look at all the lonely people — where do they all come from?”

Eleanor Rigby became the symbol of loneliness in the ‘60s and ‘70s, and we still hear it in the 21st century and we still resonate to it.
The Beatles were not singing the blues for themselves.
They vocalized loneliness —
the century̓s saddest disease.

As I noted last week, I am doing a series of sermons on the spiritual needs of Americans.
One of the most common needs uncovered by the Gallup Poll is the need for a sense of community and deeper relationships.

This confirms the study I have referred to before about the in-depth look at “friendship” among American adults.

This is the study that revealed that men in today’s society are largely friendless.

Some 60% of all the men over the age of 30 cannot identify a single person whom they would term a close friend.

The study showed that adult American women fared only slightly better.
When asked, most women can name five or six other women whom they term “close” friends.

But, when the subject is probed a bit, many of these so-called close friends are merely “functional” friends –
that is they know one another from one particular part of their lives: the pool, the circle, a garden club, bridge, whatever.

Much like the men, American women often share nothing with those persons outside that specific context.

In short, the study shows that contemporary Americans are, overall, a pretty lonesome, friendless, bunch.

Thomas Wolfe, one of our country’s greatest novelists, once wrote: “loneliness, far from being a rare and curious phenomenon…is the central and inevitable fact of human existence.”

Twenty-two percent of all Americans ate dinner alone last night.
A recent Gallup poll stated that 3 out 10 Americans are lonely.

People from all walks of life experience loneliness.
Money cannot insure against loneliness;
position cannot rise above loneliness;
power cannot stand before loneliness.

Loneliness can cause great psychological damage.
It has been estimated that 80% of the people who seek psychiatric help come primarily because of feelings associated with loneliness.
Many people become suicidal because they cannot handle the overwhelming feeling of loneliness.

Loneliness permeates our culture.

Do you remember when the telephone company had an ad that said, “Reach Out and Touch Someone.”
When you watch these beer commercials do you ever notice that the people are never drinking alone; they are always drinking with someone else?
There are even “900” numbers where you can call just to talk to people.

Lonely people wander all over our society trying to look for someone or something that can cure their loneliness.

In many cities you used to have “Lonely Heart’s Clubs” where people would try to be lonely together.

Well, friends, I am here to tell you today that our faith can help overcome this cloud of loneliness that so many feel.

If you are a child of God today you may be lonely, but it’s not because you’re alone.
As a child of God you enjoy the permanent company of God the Father who said,
“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Heb. 13:5)
You enjoy unbroken fellowship with God the Son who said, “Lo, I am with you always.” (Mt. 28:20)
You enjoy the continuing presence of God the Holy Spirit who we are told, “will abide with us forever.” (Jn. 14:16)
The first cure for loneliness is to remember what Jesus said, “I call you friend.”

And the second cure for loneliness is to reach out to someone else.
If you are lonely look for someone else who is lonely and befriend them;
be a blessing to them.
It is possible for you to forget about your loneliness as you to cure their loneliness.

Several years ago, family therapist, Virginia Satir wrote a book entitled, Peoplemaking.
Not only was this a good descriptive for what happens in functional families, but I thought it was descriptive of the church, as well.

In the best sense, we here at Christ Church, are about peoplemaking.

Here, we teach and share values which enhance a person’s life and enable full growth to occur.

In a very real sense, our churches are probably the only place left in our culture where there is any chance of making friends –
of bonding with another person
around common concerns,
common interests,
a common faith.

Friends, let the word go out –
especially in these perilous time –
that Christ Church is a place where friends are made.
Loneliness can be overcome – right here in Drexel Hill.

These comments are excerpted from a sermon heard by the congregation of Christ Presbyterian Church in Drexel Hill, Pennsylvania, USA, Sunday, March 27, 2011.